Lying kills people.
- Dr. Brad Blanton
That’s the major theme of Dr. Blanton’s bestseller, Radical Honesty. Dr. Blanton is a psychotherapist who goes on to write the a majority of his “garden-variety” neurotic clients are otherwise normal people who are only ailed by the fact that they won’t stop criticizing themselves. This self-criticism is caused by what he calls “learned deadness,” which in other words are behaviors where we hide our true selves. As children we find that being our authentic, “fully alive” selves are inappropriate so we need to hide it, essentially “deaden” our true liveliness.
This is what Blanton means by lying. Lying is any inauthentic communication to the world. It doesn’t “kill” the people being “lied to.” It kills the liar. A study by The Center for Disease Control in Atlanta says that 53% of of people who die before 65 do so because of reasons do to lifestyle. People literally kill themselves instead reconnecting with their true selves, their authentic life, their freedom.
The goal of Radical Honesty is freedom. Freedom can only be achieved by telling the truth. Freedom IS telling the truth. It’s showing up in the world completely transparent and congruent.
Happiness is when your words, thoughts, and actions are in harmony.
Unfortunately most people choose deadness over freedom. Being your authentic self can make a lot people mad at you. To have your authentic action controlled by the criticism of other people is the opposite of freedom. It’s a jail sentence. Sadly this need to be liked by everyone places has us choose jail time far too often. But think about it for a second. Do you really care about being disliked by people who don’t like who you REALLY are. Or better said, does your AUTHENTIC SELF care about what some critical people think? Dr. Blanton, Mahatma Gandhi, and Dr. Seuss certainly don’t.